SmarterChild

            Raise your hand if you remember AOL instant messenger. If not, just imagine a super lame Facebook with no pictures or videos or profiles or anyone’s real name—just chat. Instant messenger was the first exposure to text communication for a lot of kids in my generation. It was like, “Hey look! We can talk to each other over the internet!” Our parents were screaming Y2K. They didn’t know how to handle it. The problem was that kids had access to instant messenger in elementary school. It was free to download, and everyone had it. That means my shitty little third grade self had the capability to write anything I wanted in text format and instantaneously shoot it across the web. And that’s exactly what I did.

            I recall, shortly after discovering dirty language, copying and pasting massive blocks of these vulgar words and sending them to my classmates over AIM. Because I could. It was new and exciting and there were no consequences! Well, at least, I didn’t know what the consequences were. But one day my friend left his instant messenger up on the family computer. LOL

madups123: FUCK BALLS SHIT FUCK BALLS SHIT FUCK BALLS SHIT!!!

coolbballkid48: who is this?

madups123: what? it’s mark. duh

coolbballkid48: hi mark. this is frank’s mom.

madups123: smh*

*dramatization

     

            Frank's mom called Mark’s mom. Mark’s mom told Mark’s dad. Mark lost AIM privileges for a while. Eventually, however, he got them back. And what did Mark do once he got his AIM privileges back? He continued to exercise his rights given to him in the first amendment of the constitution! I was planning on using this story to demonstrate some greater meaning. fuk dat, kids rule.