Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Shit Jake Max Says: Volume III

Title speaks for itself.

"Dude this is the key, you can get cool cords and shit."

"A girl like me would be a terrible specimen."

"I could rock those sunglasses like a hurricane."

"This new Discovery Channel bag is great."

"I'm a quochine."

"I hope I do some molly or something."

"I love the premise of an isolated mystery."

"Don't worry, I have it backed up on the iCloud."

"There are no rules in the flavored ice business."

"I am pretty serious rapage material."

"I'm ready for some conch in my mouth."

"I love being little spoon."

"Cause I'd like to have sex and drink coffee every once in a while."

"I forgot to marshmallow my Mango Bango!"

"It was love at first ball-stuck-in-tits."

"Urine is my friend."

"That is a quality flick."

"I'm really into purchasing music right now because I can."

"It's like...cumming in your own mouth. That good."

"Have I shown you this deodorant? It has a slight coconut tinge."

"I don't think I've met a chip I don't like."

"I didn't want to look at her face, cause I was afraid of how bad it would be."

"I came in ninth in javelin once."

"You know I like investing in my little 'projects'."

"Dude, there's nothing like a ballpark frank."

"No, I just like codes and stuff."

"I don't think she's mean, she just has a problem."

"I'm just securing hella positions."


"I want vegetable stew. Right now."

"Fuck this, I'm the best employee ever."

"He has a quop in the car?"

"Come on, just bump me harder."

"Can you imagine getting murdered to this song?"

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