Insomnia

            Not being able to fall asleep is one of the most frustrating feelings I’ve ever experienced. It’s 5:08 a.m. right now, and I’m writing a blog post about insomnia in an attempt to aid my own sleeplessness. Although I know this is probably happening to me because of the four-hour nap I took this afternoon, I can’t help but allow a plethora of other explanations flush into my head. Every time I try to lay my head down on the pillow and close my eyes, my brain goes haywire with absurdly random thoughts, as evidenced by my tweet at 4:16 a.m.: “I wonder if anyone has ever died in a snuggie.” My heart begins to race as I realize that I can’t relax my body enough to the point where it realizes I want it to rest. More strange thoughts. When’s the last time I’ve had crab legs? I go downstairs and selfishly snatch my long-haired Chihuahua from her dog bed. Maybe she will calm me down, I reason. Ephemeral relief; next idea. How about music? Getting progressively more agitated. Every song seems to ignite past memories. What. The. Fuck. Wondering why my brain isn’t this active during school. I’m starting to regret watching all of those TED talks. The multiverse, printing organs—too much to think about. Please, God, let me fall asleep before the sun comes out. Air conditioning feels nice. I remember something my science teacher told me about computer and TV screens confusing our brains into thinking it’s still daytime out. Was that…a bird chirping? 5:33 a.m. Some people are waking up for work right now; I haven’t even fallen asleep. Infomercials have ended. Real TV is about to start. 2 people on Facebook Chat. Considering running a few laps around the house. Don’t think I’m that desperate. Yet. Did I change tenses while writing this? How about I put off sleep for today. Can you do that? The one crooked blind on my window is letting me know that the sky is no longer black. Wow, I’m really hungry. When is it OK to eat breakfast?