Wednesday, January 6, 2016

Josh gets a girlfriend

The following takes place approximately four years after Chapter 5: Meet Josh. They are now seniors in college.

I’m not gonna lie to you, the kid pulled, alright—but, he had never had a girlfriend.  Not for lack of trying, mind you—well at least not on the part of the women that so regularly blew in and out of his life, like an endless hurricane.  There was Jessica, and then Krista, and Samantha, and Monique (she was a feisty one), and…well you get the point.  There were a lot, but each as exciting and, yet, uninteresting as the last.

We both agreed, two weeks into what was now the heart of fall semester, that Monique was his best catch of all time.  Sexy, hilarious, she could drink us both under the table—she had it all.  But then volleyball practices started, and she met Carlos, and it all ended pretty quickly thereafter.

He’d been with half a dozen women—yes, we were officially seniors, and our peers of the female variety were to be properly referred to as women—since, each more gorgeous than the last, but he just wasn’t a girlfriend guy.  No one was good enough for Josh; heck, I’d kill to sleep with half the women he’s been with, but, nonetheless, he remained single.

Until Sunday.

Sunday morning at 11:47 AM my phone buzzed.  Naturally, it was Josh.
            Josh: dude…
            Josh: you up?
            Me: now I am..what’s up?
I grabbed my Gatorade bottle, hoping there was no vodka in this one.  After a small sip I was convinced it was safe to chug half the bottle chasing 3 Advils.
            Josh: you’re not gonna believe it, bro
            Me: humor me…
I rolled out of bed and proceeded directly to the couch. 11:58—62 minutes until football.  I reached for the grinder.
            Josh: I think I have a girlfriend
            Me: shut the fuck up. I’m lighting this in 10 minutes you better hurry.
            Josh: you can ask her yourself if you feel like it…
            Me: and who might that be?
            Josh: Tressa.
I dropped the grinder.

Holy shit.  He wasn’t kidding.

            Me: Tressa?!?! I thought you haven’t spoken to her in months.
            Josh: I hadn’t..
            Me: and now you’re dating?
            Josh: well…yeah.

If you haven’t noticed, Josh was a horrible texter, so I’ll tell you the story myself.  Tressa was the one got away.  Josh’s freshman formal date, that he never texted again.  I thought he was crazy, but to his credit, the man had principles, and she never texted him either.  Until Saturday night, apparently, when she hit him up out of the blue.  Within the hour she was at his place drinking wine.  And, now, apparently, they were dating.

Ah, Tressa, what a girl.  Thank god, he didn’t let her get away twice.  At least, that’s what he told me when he called to tell me they were getting engaged.  But, I digress again, that didn’t happen for another few years, yet, on that unforgettable Sunday morning, what Josh and Tressa had was unparalleled.  I wouldn’t venture to call it true love, because I fear I don’t even know if true love is something that really exists, or simply something made up by a bunch of screenwriters in Hollywood.


What happened that day, however (or I guess if we’re being specific, the night before), was true passion.  I didn’t see a lot of true passion those days.  Let alone, hear stories of college students engaging in bold romantic gestures like we grew up seeing in the movies.  Hell, for a while I gave up on romance altogether, conforming to the reality of drunken sloppy matchmaking at shitty, overpriced bars.  Josh and Tressa were always different, though—that’s for sure.

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